It has been my habit for many years to create what was to be an annual birthday “card.” Alas, world events of the negative variety have intruded and multiple versions have become the new normal.
Below is a compilation; formatting has been made consistent, for ease of perusal. The original “cards” came in different shapes, with a variety of borders.
2020: Version Two
In the past, I have attempted to inject some levity into my birthday “cards.” However, the Coronavirus makes this extremely difficult.
The high road is to quote somebody near and dear to me, who says our situation is “an opportunity for the best of humankind to shine.” To which I typically would be tempted to respond, “and coffee is still readily available,” clearly an attempt at deflection.
Given the extreme nature of the reaction to the Coronavirus, why the complete panic, with each political entity attempting to one-up the next in terms of its draconian regulations?
The answer is simple: we have not, yet, figured out the calculus of the new virus. Uncertainty reigns supreme.
Yipes, what a downer of a BIRTHDAY CARD! My bad!
The saving grace (maybe) of this missive is a moral: treat each day, not simply your annual celebration, as 24 hours to be valued for and by you, your loved ones, and your broader community, however you define it.
**
2020
Okay, everything is a little crazy at the moment.
Uh, more than a little — or maybe we are mistaking “crazy” for situations which are only “different.”
No, I do not think there is an on-going error in perception: the combination of characteristics now relevant to the American socio/economic/political scene is truly unprecedented.
Given this environment, it is particularly gratifying that there is one unchanging aspect of your life: your BIRTHDAY is the same date every year!
This is true regardless of the weather, the economy, or the utter nonsense taking place in various government locations.
If the latter is stressing you –(I cannot be alone in feeling angst over the state of the world) ignore it.
Instead ………………….. HAVE AN AWESOME DAY!
**
2019
I try to write a Birthday Letter
which can be used for twelve months. However, every day there is a tweet which makes sustained thought
and commentary impossible.
At times, I feel shut-down,
as if there was a wall
between rationality
and what I see happening.
Ah, forget it, relax,
go to Noches de Colombia
or another restaurant and
have the band serenade you
with music which drowns out everything.
Happy Birthday!
**
2018: Version Two
In attempting to create a new “card,”
I am struggling to cope with
the most bizarre set of circumstances,
make that
the most nauseating political environment,
of my lengthy life.
Attacks, both verbal and otherwise, at times
seem to foreshadow the day when
legislators throw actual stuff
at each other, which happens already in
so-called less developed countries.
The room for nuanced discussion is about as wide
as a gymnastic balance beam!
It therefore is completely understandable
if on this special day, you toss down
more than one high-octane beverage.
It’s your BIRTHDAY:
ignore my venting and be HAPPY!
**
2018
I am completely confused.
If one pays any attention to the media
or the typical man or woman in the street,
our President is like, you know, the worst ever.
Meanwhile, the economy continues to move ahead and the stock market reaches new highs,
which parenthetically helps not only the 1% but ordinary people whose pension plans are investors.
If the Democrats sweep the off-year elections and/or Trump gets impeached, to expect the economy
and the market to continue growing
is to say that good news has no limits.
Historians might comment that nothing grows
to the sky. Investors might recall the adage,
“buy on the anticipation, sell on the news.”
Do you see why I am
befuddled!
The one consistency in this mess is that,
like last year, today is your
BIRTHDAY: ignore the
stuff above and be HAPPY.
**
2017
This is unprecedented!
No, I am not referring to the presidency of
Donald Trump, but the fact that I have now been forced to revise my birthday letter multiple times before hitting “send.”
I would have thought that when the whining of the losers subsided and the curtains were fully pulled back, rational attention would have been shifted to the country’s systemic and structural challenges.
Instead, everything political has been chaotic.
It does not appear that
an extremist is being pulled back toward the political center, as usually
happens. Instead, his own party is more divided than ever.
It is a situation that could drive a person to drink.
It’s your BIRTHDAY. Have a HAPPY one,
even if you need a designated driver.
**
2016
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!
Prior recipients of my birthday cards probably have noticed that a modest amount of creativity is typically connected to some observations about negative situations.
I hereby resolve to avoid commenting on crazy things, like the current farce which masquerades as a presidential campaign or our stupidity about gun control or our dysfunctional education system.
Instead, I note that people from everywhere around the world still want to come here to live. See how positive I can be!
So go forth, to a place of ample food and drink, and CELEBRATE your special day!
**
2015
If we can survive atrocities like beheadings and banalities like bieber, maybe people have an inner fiber which defies ordinary logic.
Lamentable and laughable simply become descriptors of program feeds into a Twitter world.
Yipes, this is supposed to be a Birthday card, not a snappy synopsis of the world.
Besides, I have no idea what it all means: I wrote this while on Sabbatical in Barcelona. The positives there are as ubiquitous as café con leche and as rich as xocolata croissants.
Which reminds me— take time today for a nice piece of cake and forget how many years you have crossed off the calendar of life.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!
**
2014
I know this is a crushing disappointment, but the year 2014 will be missing a paper version of my birthday wishes. Kicking and screaming, I have been pulled into the brave new world of technology and am now e-mailing my incredibly creative and deeply meaningful birthday messages.
Fewer trees fallen, no trips to the mismanaged post office, some dollars saved for use in student scholarships—all are collateral benefits of this seismic shift.
Wait—the birthday message itself!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
MAY ALL THE SERVERS AT YOUR FAVORITE RESTAURANT EMBARRASS YOU BY SERENADING YOU AT THE TOP OF THEIR LUNGS. AND MAY YOU REALIZE THAT WITHOUT A SENSE OF HUMOR, THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT TO ACCEPT AS BEING AT ALL RATIONAL.
**
2013
Let’s see: the economy is lousy, natural and man-made disasters seem to be more frequent, politics has become even more distasteful than ever—-blah, blah, blah!
FORGETTABOUTIT!
HAVE A PARTY!
DID I SAY HAPPY BIRTHDAY?
THAT IS WHAT I MEANT TO CONVEY IN THIS MESSAGE.
HAVE FUN. STAY HEALTHY. PEACE.
**
2012
This year’s card is missing in action. I have no idea why. I would make a joke about a virus having eaten it, but somehow that is more than a bit tacky in 2020.
**
2011
HAPPY BIRTHDAY..…HAPPY BIRTHDAY
Wasn’t it yesterday when we were worrying about
computers crashing as we moved into the 21st century?
And now, in 2011, we have an “app” for everything–
except happiness, prosperity, and acceptance of differences.
But the heck with thinking about all of the above,
it’s your birthday—have a great time!